Thursday, January 28, 2016

Week Two Storytelling: Sita's Secret

As they both stared out the double-paned windows that covered each wall of the office, Dr. Kevorkian wondered if Sita would answer his questions.  Each time they would meet, she looked for the chaise lounge that was adjacent to his desk.  It was there where she lay down with her legs crossed and arms dangling from both sides, twisting the strands of the white shag carpet.  Dr. Kevorkian had never encountered a patient like her, but then again after twenty years, he had only had three clients. He found his calling in the field of psychology and being a part-time life coach to those who were in need of motivation and confidence-building.  When he started his practice, the courts assigned Sita to Dr. Kevorkian after her abduction.

Dr. Kevorkian: Sita, are you going answer my question?

Sita: And what question was that?

Dr. Kevorkian: How did you feel when Ravana abducted you?  From the court's transcript, you never answered the question.  You said, and I quote...

“When Ravana took me from my love, I only imagined that I would be lost from his arms forever.  Each day I spent at Ravana’s palace became another night, and another night became another week, which turned into months at a time. I would kneel in the room of jewels and gems near the fireplace that burned an everlasting fire, while Ravana would stand behind me breathing what felt like a warm mist on my neck and whispering things in my ears. He then would put his hands on my waist, two on my shoulders, and one in my hair.”

So, what I asked you, and have been asking you for the past twenty plus years is, how did you feel? What emotions came over you? Did you think that Rama would save you?

Sita: Maybe you’re asking the wrong question.  Maybe you should ask if I went willingly.

Dr. Kevorkian: Did you?

Sita: Rama stated in court that day, “Sita had an opportunity to jump from Ravana’s shoulders, but then again she is afraid of heights.” Did you not tell Rama that I blame myself for the abduction, and the reason why I continue to have nightmares is because of a guilty conscience?

*Sita sits up looking at Dr. Kevorkian after not receiving an answer.*

Sita:  What are you writing?

Dr. Kevorkian: My grocery list. Would you like to see?

Sita: No…but I want to tell you something.

Dr. Kevorkian: Okay?

Sita: Sit next me.

Dr. Kevorkian: You can’t tell me while I sit here, and you sit there?

*Sita pats the chaise lounge signaling Dr. Kevorkian to sit next to her.  He stands up and walks near the chaise lounge with his yellow legal pad in hand, and proceeds to sit down.*


Sita: When I was four, my mother had a best friend who built her home next to our palace.  I could see her home from my window.  It was covered in ivy vines and golden-colored bricks.  Each day, my mother and her friend would go into the garden, and my mother's friend would bring her son Aakarshan.  He had a gift of attracting butterflies, and he would call upon them so they would sit on the flowers and fly around in the garden.  Sometimes, Aakarshan would whisper to one whenever he knew I was watching him from behind a tree, and tell it to fly near me and land on my shoulder.  We became close over the next few years until my mother died.  From then on, her friend and son was banished from the palace because Papa was overwhelmed by the memories of mother. I always looked out the window to see if I could catch a glimpse of them from their patio, and I never did.  As the months passed, those windows were boarded up, and the house was left empty.  When Papa finally gave me freedom to walk to the market with Pahdam, my governess, it was there in the market where I saw the beautiful butterfly boy.  I ran up behind him and put my hands over his eyes.

“Guess who?” I said.

The man started to smile and turn around. He looked me in my eyes and said,


“Girls like you should be more careful when touching men they do not know.  It may come off as promiscuity unless that is what you are aiming for.”

I was confused, and I did not know why he was being cold.  I knew those chestnut brown eyes, coal black hair, and skin that was the color of amber.  He even smelled of honey and lavender.  I just stood before him, and he yelled at me to go.  Each night I thought of him until the day I met Rama.  When Ravana abducted me, I began to think of Aakarshan. Our mothers would tell us the stories of the Gods and demons that walked amongst us here on earth, and the story of Ravana was my favorite.  Aakarshan and I would run around the garden and pretend that Ravana had taken me far far away, and each time Aakarshan would save me.  When Ravana did abduct me, I wanted Aakarshan to save me. I hoped for him, and I prayed for him. Rama ended up defeating Ravana, not Aakarshan.  When I dream, I don’t dream of Ravana.  I dream of Aakarshan and of him holding me in his arms.  When I wake up, I see an unrecognizable man lying next to me.  Can I tell you a secret?

Dr. Kevorkian: Yes.

Sita: Before I married Rama, I found out that Aakarshan was actually the first man to complete Father’s task with the bow of Dhanush Shiva, not Rama.  Phadam told me that Aakarshan proved to papa that he was worthy to take my hand, and Papa told him no.  So when I was abducted by Ravana, truth be told… I did go willingly.


Author’s Note: This story was inspired by the Indian Epic “The Ramayana” written by R.K. Narayan.  In the epic, a princess by the name of Sita fell in love with a Prince named Rama after only seeing him once.  Rama too fancied Sita.  Rama did not know that Sita was the daughter of King Janaka. Sage Vishvamitra ordered Rama to complete King Janaka's bridal task. Any man who was able to complete the task would marry King Janaka's daughter.  King Janaka's bridal task consisted of a man stringing the bow of Dhanush Shiva. In Rama’s attempt, he broke the bow into two pieces showing the great power that he possessed.  Rama and Sita wedded after receiving the blessing from Sita’s father.  When  the wedded couple arrived to Rama's palace, Rama's father felt that he should be the chosen one to rule over their land.  When Rama's stepmother discovered this, she protested and reminded the king that he promised the throne to her son. Rama was later sentenced to exile in the forest for a period of fourteen years.  Sita followed her husband into exile, and was abducted by the demon king Ravana.  Ravana took Sita to Lanka where he resided and later was defeated by Rama in battle.


      For this story, I wanted to give Sita a life before Rama.  In the epic, readers are not given any information on her life previous to her meeting Rama.  I felt that Sita was not her own person, but lived in Rama's shadow. Adding the character Askarshan to the story was eliminating the attention that was given to Rama.  I wanted Sita to experience a love before Rama, a love that she had never quite gotten over.  Moreover, I chose Dr. Kevorkian to be her psychologist because was an advocate for assisted suicide.  He believed that a person should be able to make their own decisions when it came to their personal lives whether it was considered moral or immoral by law. 


Bibliography: “The Ramayana” written by R.K. Narayan (1972)

15 comments:

  1. Hi Dijoun,

    Your story was so interesting! You really branched out from the original tale to give Sita a life of her own, independent of Rama (and, I think, closer to a reality than their overdramatic meeting and wedding). What led you to include the character of Aakarshan and to have Sita prefer him to Rama?

    I also liked the format and setting of your story. You added so much depth to the characters, with Sita's secret story and the doctor's thoughts (which occasionally added a bit of fun humor). I find it difficult to really branch out from what we're reading in class when I try to do the Storytelling assignments, and I'm really impressed with the routes in which you chose to develop Sita's side of The Ramayana.

    I also like the images you chose for this storytelling post. I think Sita's facial expressions match what's going on in the story well -- she looks sad when she begins telling it, but surprisingly pleasant when Ravana is abducting her.

    I look forward to reading your next posts!

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    1. Hi Susie,

      Thank you for your remarks. I added teh character Aakarshan to the story because I wanted to give Sita a life before Rama. In the epic you see how devoted she is to him, and how prideful he is. I wanted her to be a multifaceted character compared to the one we saw in the epic. Thank you again for coming by. I hope that I can keep you entertained throughout the semester.

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  2. Hi again! I like the way you decided to retell this story with your own spin on it. I thought it was a cool idea to put the setting in a court room for some of the story. It makes it seem more modern than the original story. I also think this story is very dramatic and well written.
    I'm looking forward to reading more of your stories.
    -Sara

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  3. This was amazing!!! When I began reading the story, I was already absorbed in all the scenes you were depicting. The descriptions and intricate details really brought the whole story together. I like the idea of having Rita talking to someone about the events before and after her abduction. The fact that you provided a plot twist was great. Although I really like Rama and Sita together, your story had me rooting a bit for Sita and Aakarshan. I also really liked your use of humor. Even though the whole story was focusing on Sita’s thoughts on her abduction and whether she had gone willingly or not, the tidbit about the doctor’s grocery list made me laugh. It was a great example of comic relief! Your writing style is one that can capture one’s attention and keep them focused on your story. I thoroughly enjoyed reading your story and I actually really want to hear a continuation of it if you ever decide to do so.

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    1. Thank you Bayan!! I too liked Rama and Sita together, but he really got under my skin when he wanted to test Sita's fidelity. I might make a part two to this story, and if so I will most definitely let you know.

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  4. Great job with this story! Just from the title I was very interested to learn what her secret would be, that is a very good hook for the reader. I thought the style you used was perfect for showing a secret that Sita really did not feel like she could tell anyone else. My favorite part of this story is the way that the story unraveled. I seemed to be learning new twists to it at every turn. I wonder what has happened in the past 20 years while Dr. Kevorkian. What exactly was she in court for if Ravana was killed by Rama? If Dr. Kevorkian is asking her whether she went willingly or not, does that mean she is still with Rama? Why did she not end up with Aakarshan if that is whom she dreamed about while in captivity? Again, great job with the story, this was very well written.

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    1. Hi Taler,

      Thank you for the compliment. I try to make stories where I have everyone including myself guessing about everything. I just hope that I can keep this going.

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  5. Wow! Not only was the story well written, was also incredibly unique! In thinking of stories to write, I never come up with ideas so out-of-the-box. Not only did you place Sita in an interesting environment, but you also added an entirely new element: her previous love of Aakarshan.

    The flow of the story was perfect. Visualizing the events as I followed along, I felt as though I moved fluidly from the scene of the psych office to the scenes of Sita's memories. The conversations progressed smoothly and I found it easy to distinguish between what was being said and what was actually happening.

    The form was equally as intuitive. The tale was broken up into manageable sections that isolated each event quite nicely. The spacing allowed me to easily notice when dialog switched between characters and the size of the text was readable.

    I only have two minor criticisms:
    (1) One grammar error - "..and then [laid] down with her legs crossed and arms dangling from both sides..".
    (2) Overuse of commas in some sentences - " It was covered in ivy vines[,] and golden colored bricks. Each day, my mother and her friend would go into the garden[,] and she would bring her son Aakarshan. He had a gift of attracting butterflies, and he would call upon them".

    I am 100% guilty of overusing commas. It's an area that I always find myself struggling in. As such, I am not always the best judge of when is too much or little, so be sure to check with others first if you decide to edit this tale.

    Except for those two minor details, everything was great. I speak honestly when I say that I am jealous of your writing ability. I feel as though your story helped me see a different perspective on storytelling--how you can completely change the environment, add in extra details, and add depth to a character's personality. The detail you included and the emotion you portrayed through language was excellent. Thank you so much for sharing!

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    1. Hi Austin,

      Thank you for pointing those things out. I will admit that I was struggling with those paragraphs and I could not figure out why they were not sounding/flowing right. Thank you again! I'm going to correct it. =)

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  6. Hello there!
    This story has such an interesting twist of events. I really like the idea of Sita not being the love-struck puppy that the Ramayana makes her out to be. Also, in the Ramayana, Rama is quick to judge her at the end and make her go through the fire test, when she could have just as easily been upset with him. He took his sweet time conquering monkey kings and what have you. I can only imagine the deep sorrow that would push Sita to willingly being taken by Ravana – Rama should do some self-checking (he really does come off as egotistical). This was a great story!!

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    1. I completely agree with you! Rama had such a "god complex" about him. I was rooting for him in the beginning, but he really ticked me off in the end. I'm glad I was not the only one who shared these feelings.

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  7. Hello!
    I really enjoyed the portfolio index description. The picture was a nice addition too. The format and setup of your blog was really easy on the eyes, as well as the dark font color on the light pink background.
    Your story was wonderful! I absolutely did not expect what happened. I had never imagined Sita with anyone but Rama, so hearing that she loved another man more and that she didn't run Ravana was a whole new take on this story I have read so much about.
    I enjoyed the paragraph style with broken up dialogue using colons instead of quotation marks. The font itself was a little small for my liking, but maybe I don't have the best eye sight :) . Your author's note was a great addition at the end (and specifically at the end, because it has spoilers!) and I liked how you cleared a few things up.

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  8. I like the theme that you chose for your story, I think it works very well here. A therapy session is the perfect time to talk about past events that your character experienced. You nicely build up an air of mystery and curiosity before Sita launches into her story. I think it is ironic that Sita plays pretend as a child and images that Ravana will take her way, and then it eventually happened.
    I like the twist at the end of this story. I wonder why Sita married Rama instead of Aakarshan.
    I am glad you did finally answer the question at the end of your story, that Sita did go willingly. I have read many stories were they leave the reader wondering at the end and are free to make up their own ending. In this case I think telling the reader works better, and I am glad you did.

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  9. Oh my goodness, I was not prepared for this story... in a good way! I love how you gave Sita a voice outside of Rama's perspective. I quite like Sita being an independent woman. You really branched out from the original story and I really enjoyed that. You did a wonderful job making this story build up. At first, I was confused because I wasn't sure where you were going. I wonder why Sita married Rama. She seems still very much in love with Aakarshan. I never understood that in some stories. Why not go with who you really love? I think you did a really good job with this story. I am happy that she admitted that she willingly got kidnapped. I think it adds a layer of complexity that may not have been there had you not. Especially after she pretended to be kidnapped when she was younger. Thank you so much for sharing this story. It was wonderful.

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